Mummy had a melt down - then we went to the Park

This morning I had a little mini melt down......

Just a little one....

I will start at the beginning... 

Last night I had a really bad night with AJ. She just would not sleep and would not let me sleep. She went to bed as usual at 6.30 and went to sleep fine. Then she woke up at 8.30 and there was no getting her settled back down to sleep. I gave her calpol, a drink, a (breast)feed, a cuddle, daddy gave her a cuddle, we played her Mozart (which normally works miracles), but she was having none of it so at 10:30 I gave up and went downstairs with her. I finally got her to go back to bed about 1am.

Luckily CJ offered to get up with the children in the morning which gave me an extra two hours in bed. I had to get up at 8am anyway to take the kids to kindermusic.

We were running late for kindermusic so CJ gave us a lift and we got there right on time. I was feeling a little harassed at getting up late and rushing out the door.

We got in and found a spot on the floor and got settled. Then OJ started running out of the main room and into the office. While I ran after him AJ started screaming at being left on her own. He did this a few times before the leader of the kindermusic group shut the door to start the group. Then OJ decided to raid the toy boxes in the corner, I tried to distract him and redirect his attention to the kindermusic lady but he was adamant he wanted to play with these toys. Three times I had to distract him before he threw a massive tantrum, screaming the place down throwing himself on the floor and turning bright red and going limp. I took him outside to try to calm him down which he did but he then refused to go back in the room. So I made a decision and took them home instead.

That's when I had my little mini meltdown. I managed to hold it together while I got him outside and got the pram out of the locked up shelter and the reception lady gave me my money back and said it's probably just a phase he's going through or that he is just the wrong way out. Trying to conjole me and make me feel better. 

Then I got off the premises...

...and burst into tears.

 I always see these well behaved kids taking part in activities, doing everything the leader is doing. Getting involved, chatting away and talking. 

Then there's OJ. Who appears to march to his own drum if you will. He certainly has a mind of his own and won't do what he doesn't want to do and will do what HE wants to do. He is stubborn. I know this is a good thing, to have a mind of his own but it makes organised activities almost impossible and makes me not want to attend. I cried all the way home, passers by must of thought I was a right idiot.

 I cried that I had to take them both out of the room

That AJ didn't get to enjoy the group

That OJ wanted to play and I couldn't/wouldn't let him

That I never see other children acting up as badly as mine (although I know they must do)

That I think I dealt with the situation badly

I could have dealt with it better

That I was even having this melt down to start off with.

I could feel stares and giggles from other parents.

We went home and had a play for a bit, I put AJ down for her nap, CJ went upstairs to have a nap and me and OJ had a cuddle on the sofa and fell asleep. Everyone woke up in much better moods. So we went to the park for some family fun.